A sassy blonde doctir
Sassy until she dates men
The scarlet letter

end haikyu

Hi blog,

like i am biternss barbie tonight i just found out that dr loila hasnt been responding to my love nots or my invitashins to my bi makeout parteas because she is dating...a guy! like i am so sad it reminds me of that empowered song Marianne Faihfull wrote, this one:

Why’d Ya Do It?

When I stole a twig from our little nest
And gave it to a bird with nothing in her beak,
I had my balls and my brains put into a vice
And twisted around for a whole fucking week.
Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd you let that trash
Get a hold of your cock, get stoned on my hash ?

Whyd ya do it she said, whyd you let her suck your cock ?
Oh, do me a favour, dont put me in the dark.
Whyd ya do it, she said, theyre mine all your jewels,
You just tied me to the mast of the ship of fools.

Whyd ya do it, she said, when you know it makes me sore,
cause she had cobwebs up her fanny and I believe in giving to the poor.
Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd you spit on my snatch ?
Are we out of love now, is this just a bad patch ?

Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd you do what you did ?
You drove my ego to a really bad skid.

Whyd you do it, she said, aint nothing to laugh,
You just tore all our kisses right in half!

Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd ya do what you did,
Betray my little oyster for such a low bitch.

Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd you do what you did ?
You drove my ego to a really bad skid.

Whyd ya do it, she screamed, after all weve said
Every time I see your dick I see her cunt in my bed.

The whole room was swirling,
Her lips were still curling.

Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd you do what you did
Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd you do what you did
Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd ya do it, she said,
Whyd you do what you did ?

Oh, big grey mother, I love you forever
With your barbed wire pussy and your good and bad weather.
Whyd ya do it, she said, whyd you do what you did ...

i am bi and now single

xxx

sally

hi blog,

like i have still not heard or seen of mary alice and i am like starting to get worried i had my witchy mother drive me over to her house to expliain to Mary Aloices christian fundamentalist parints that 1. i am not a whore and 2. i will not be the devils playtoy for getting prgnint at 15 and 3. I DONT KNOW WHERE FUCKING MARY ALOICE IS AND I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH HER DISAPIRINCE...this time...for fucks sake.

after they prayid for our sins me and my mother left and she said now she sees why mary alice is so f'd up and i was like yeah! what do you expect from the Elizabeth Hasselbeck fan club presidents?

so we went over to mary alices funny uncles house the one that used to make all of those undergrund films of me and and mary alice dancing in his basement and like his sister anwird the door and was being shady and said he wasnt home but I knew he was because he never goes out so i forcid myway into the house and he was laying on his bed with a t shirt over his face and i was like 'where's mary alice' and he didnt say anything. his sister grabbed me and pulled meout of the room and said not to bother him because he was 'playing ostridge'. creepy!

so i sat on the couch telling her that mary aloice was missing and like her funny uncle would run from one door way to the other caover most of his face except his eyes and it spooked me so we left amd we still dont know where mary alice is.

so i was on myspace the other day and like i found sassy crotneys home page and like i sent her a freind request but she probabliyly wont except it because i fell on her at that book signing when i pulled my dress over my head and askid her to sign my empowird stomach and like her new album isnt coming out until winter and i cant wait that long.

is this some sort of bad carma? no mary alice? no knew crotney music? what the f.

i think ill right dr. lila a bi love letter.

xxx

sally

hi blog

like i just got a bilituon on myspace and this sassy guy posted these new videos of Crotney from last week and she looks so sassy she must be on the key diet too ! look

i am bi

xx

sally glass

Pacific Coast Highway

Another Highway

Nobodies Daughetr

Sunset Maqkey

good mroing blog

like i was just waking up and was waching the new Gwen Stefani video for the Sweet Escape or some shit like that...what is wrong with her???

when she was in no doubt her songs sonded like...real songs, not lots of dippy samples strung together like a tight sweater. she makes no sense. and am i the only one who noticed that this sweetest thing song sounds alot like Madoinas True Blue? and how rude of GS not to have the scrupulusly plucked Debbie Mazar in the remake of True Blue...

i have to find my keys and make some drawings about all of thise disempowerment....

xoxo

sally glass

like I am on a roll tonight bulitin my key diet has me extra peppy.

so i was just over on the rigot grrrl site and i was telling those bitches how much i hate avril levine and that as much as she would like to play dress up in hot topic she is about as punk as a william Sonoma catalogue and i hate her. i mean can she really get the Cristina Aquiliauqailia hair extenshins, have some swank photog shoot her wedding, run the lame pictures in Vantee Fair and still pretend that 1. she rocks 2. anyone cares and 3. she's punk??

and her twink tastic husband? puh-lease! before i lost mary alice her fruity brother craig was showing us some indy porn of him and the other twinks having a snake jamboree and then it became clear as to why he was covering Micheal Jakson songs. see, its all clear now!

BUT BACK TO DUMBASS, oops caps, i am sick of seeing her stare back at me from all these myspace ads with those black eyes that look like shes staring though a charred log i mean edie sejwick did that look first 70 years ago and she did it way better than fuciking bitterness barbie here.

ugh

wheres my key

xxx

sally glass

like what up blog,

i threw out my tv today because I am SO fucking sick of not only hearing bout Paris Hilton going to jail but i am so sick of heering credable journalists talking about her and what her prison life is like. you know what! its hard out there for a pimp...and its worse for a ho.

as you can tel i have NO sympathee for Hilton she is a reofending drunk driver, she calls people faggots and niggers and makes fun of grrrlz for going to public school. whats even worse is that she attracts equially vile people like that fat bloated coke bastard oil heir Brandon Davis or whatever his name is who called Linsday Lohan firecrotch. Im sorry but when you are 20 something years old and cant conrtol your sweat becasue your veins are clogged with crack rocks you have no right to make fun of people...even Linsday Lohan who alost qulifies as a person.

i am sick of all these celebutards like Brinttey Spears, Linsday Lohan, the Olsen Monkeys, Paris and Nicole....who have no descernable talent other than slipping in a puddle of their own vomit while getting out of their own limo.

this is al Madonna's fault, she was a bad mom to these girls. back in the 80s, 1,400 years ago Madonna was always doing stupid shit but claimed their was artistic integrity behind it like when she cavorted with her tranny pals in that french hotel and made that dominatrix boobie video that MTV hated or when she went down to mississpipissi and lit those crosses on fire on the lawns of black people. she said she was just trying to give them light since they couldnt aford electricity but like she knew she would attract headlines. and like she meant well and i suppose if you look hard she has talent but these new celebutards grew up watching mamma and figured why bother doing the art / humanitatien work when we can just cut to the chase and show our cooch in public to be famous.

the whole lot of them make me sick which is why i threw out my tv and i should have sold it on ebay because it was shapped like hello kittys head and that was sassy but if that kitty only KNEW what was coming out of her mouth she would throw herself out too.

xxx

sally

like hi blog

did you like my sassy compisishin of course you do who doesnt love fetus siameese twins right? so spoking of the fantasticle festus i went to the Bodies exhibit this weekend in Pittsburhg and I can tell why they call it Pittsburg.

the exhibit was sort of cool, like a walking tour through Jefferey Dahmers snack buffet and i learned two things 1 i need to quit smoking because gray lungs are SO disempowered and i dont want that and even Courtney is on the news because she is quitting smoking because they found a pollock in her throat and 2 a pet fetus is way more fun than a pet rock.

see after they show you dead body dead body dead body for two hours i found this sign that said 'if sassy little fetuses in jars freak you out dont go in this room' so like alice at wonderland i dove through the door and there were sassy fetusts everywhere and like all those pro life propaganda people you see online are so full of shit. they have these posters of like, a two year old covered in blood crying and they are impying that that two year old is an eight week fetus well let me tell you i SAW an 8 week fetus and it looks like planters Mr Peanut minus the monocle and spats and walking stick. if someone suckid it out of you you probaibly wouldnt even notice so pro life people...stop your lies!

of course i was the only one in the fantasticle fetus room and since no one was looking i took this jarred fetus i named her Francis after Cournteys daughter Francis Bacon and now it is sitting on my desk as a paper wait making sure my love notes dont fly away in a brisk breeze.

sally

hi blog,

since mary aloice has ditchid me and i should be concentrating on staying out of the Wayward School For Cunty Grrrlz I diseided that I would get back to my artwork so i am going to let the Fetus Fairy rest for a while and make more fantasticle fetus art this one is called 'Play Time'.

i am bi

xxx

sally